For a few days now I have been wondering how I should put into words all the emotions I am experiencing, and how I should make connections between the strong feelings of now and events that happened recently or a longer time ago.
I was looking for a method to put all the information together in order to find an answer that will satisfy me emotionally and rationally. While looking for inspiration in my old notes that I randomly wrote as an impulse to something that represented my life at that particular time, I came across a text that is, to even my surprise, extremely relevant for my present state of mind. It goes something like this:
“I have a new theory about the world. People lose their way, sometimes because they are focusing too much on their thoughts, and they live under the impression that their mind is who they truly are. But the mind is very easily influenced by ‘facts’ that are presented to you every day. What I mean by ‘facts’ is the certainty with which we live our lives, based on things that are always changing, based on information that is missing, or based on our knowledge about the world, which is of course very limited. A quite relevant cliché in this situation is the discovery that the Earth is not flat after all. Surely we live in more developed times, but is that a good enough reason for us to make strict assumptions to live by?
Actually, the scarier thing is that the heart is also quite easily cheated. If the heart is cheated before it can stand on ‘its own two feet’, before it knows and trusts itself, the things that follow can be extremely harmful; both to your heart, and to the hearts of those around you.
I say that the heart is easily cheated, because if you do not own who you truly are and you don’t live in brutal honesty with yourself, you are going to hang on to a feeling, or a word that is going to vibrate with you, because it is something you need. You will blur the very thin line between what you desire and what you require. You will believe with all your being that what you want is what you need.
And just like that you are cheated, you are taken away from your path, and your road to the routes of the soul is clouded. Once clouded, if you are not given the opportunity, or have the courage to try to find your routes again, you might live in untruthfulness your whole life.
Look for your soul! Look for yourself! Be honest with your heart. It’s scary, and it’s hurtful, and beautiful, and calming, but not all at the same time.
I think that we humans are on a very tough journey – our whole life, for as long as we live.
It gets easier to see your soul once you start, once you begin the journey. And it is beautiful in a strange way. To feel the shape of your soul in all its forms, and to nurture it in a way that is best for you. Our souls are all we have; because inside the soul, you can find everything that matters to you. You just have to find your way back to it!”
I guess what I mean to say by all this and what I’m trying to push myself to do more is be brave. For me one very obvious form of bravery is being mercilessly truthful with yourself. I felt at times that not hiding from myself gave me the feeling of catching a breath of fresh air. It felt a bit like going on a hike and you finally reaching the summit. After all the fighting and pushing yourself to the limit, when you feel like you cannot take one more step, you finally reach the top, look at the view, take a deep breath and feel free.
… and this is what I strive for!
Accept and respect yourself, so you can repay others with the same kindness!
|4-The most important journey||Iulia Farcane||CC BY-SA 4.0|
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|1-The most important journey||Iulia Farcane||CC BY-SA 4.0|
|3-The most important journey||Iulia Farcane||CC BY-SA 4.0|